何供天地 Why Worship Only Heaven and Earth
唐僧上前，以左手撚香注爐，三匝禮拜。拜畢，回頭道：「仙童，你五莊觀真是西方仙界。何不供養三清、四帝、羅天諸宰，只將『天地』二字侍奉香火？」童子笑道：「不瞞老師說，這兩個字，上頭的，禮上還當；下邊的，還受不得我們的香火，是家師父諂佞出來的。」三藏道：「何為諂佞？」童子道：「三清是家師的朋友，四帝是家師的故人；九曜是家師的晚輩，元辰是家師的下賓。」那行者聞言，就笑得打跌。八戒道：「哥啊，你笑怎的？」行者道：「只講老孫會搗鬼，原來這道童會綑風。」三藏道：「令師何在？」童子道：「家師元始天尊降簡，請到上清天彌羅宮聽講『混元道果』去了，不在家。」行者聞言，忍不住喝了一聲道：「這個臊道童，人也不認得，你在那個面前搗鬼，扯甚麼空心架子？那彌羅宮有誰是太乙天仙？請你這潑牛蹄子去講甚麼？」唐僧上前，以左手撚香注炉，三匝礼拜。拜毕，回头道：「仙童，你五庄观真是西方仙界。何不供养三清、四帝、罗天诸宰，只将『天地』二字侍奉香火？」童子笑道：「不瞒老师说，这两个字，上头的，礼上还当；下边的，还受不得我们的香火，是家师父谄佞出来的。」三藏道：「何为谄佞？」童子道：「三清是家师的朋友，四帝是家师的故人；九曜是家师的晚辈，元辰是家师的下宾。」那行者闻言，就笑得打跌。八戒道：「哥啊，你笑怎的？」行者道：「只讲老孙会捣鬼，原来这道童会捆风。」三藏道：「令师何在？」童子道：「家师元始天尊降简，请到上清天弥罗宫听讲『混元道果』去了，不在家。」行者闻言，忍不住喝了一声道：「这个臊道童，人也不认得，你在那个面前捣鬼，扯甚么空心架子？那弥罗宫有谁是太乙天仙？请你这泼牛蹄子去讲甚么？」
逐句解 Line by line
The Tang Monk stepped forward, took incense in his left hand and set it in the censer, and made obeisance three times round.
撚香注爐, niǎn xiāng zhù lú — to pinch up a stick of incense and set it in the censer. 三匝, sān zā, three circuits. He worships first and asks questions afterwards, which is characteristic.
His worship done, he turned his head and said, "Immortal boys, your Five-Villages Abbey is truly an immortals' realm of the West.
拜畢, the obeisance finished. He is impressed, and says so before raising the difficulty.
Why do you not make offering to the Three Pure Ones, the Four Sovereigns, and the great officers of the Net-Heaven, but serve incense only to the two words 'Heaven and Earth'?"
The question is a good one and needs unpacking. 三清, the Three Pure Ones, are the supreme trinity of the Daoist pantheon. 四帝, the Four Sovereigns, are the great celestial emperors beneath them. 羅天諸宰 are the officers of the Net-Heaven, the administrative tier below that. Tripiṭaka is asking, in effect, why an abbey this grand has skipped the entire chain of command and is burning incense to an abstraction.
The boys said with a smile, "To be plain with you, Master — of these two words, the upper one is, in ritual terms, still warranted; but the lower may not even receive our incense. It is a piece of our master's flattery."
The answer begins by insulting half the scroll. Of the two words, Heaven at least is 禮上還當, defensible on ritual grounds — 當 as dāng, "fitting," in the 應當 sense. Earth is not: it may not so much as receive their incense. And the whole arrangement, they say, is their master's 諂佞, chǎn nìng, sycophancy. 還受不得 takes 得 as dé, "able."
Tripiṭaka said, "What do you mean by 'flattery'?"
何為 here takes 為 as the copular wéi, "what is meant by," matching 何謂. Distinguish it from 為何, "why," which takes wèi; both appear in this chapter.
The boys said, "The Three Pure Ones are our master's friends; the Four Sovereigns his old acquaintances; the Nine Luminaries his juniors; the Primal Powers his lesser guests."
And here is the joke the whole passage has been building to. The Three Pure Ones are his friends. The Four Sovereigns are old acquaintances. The 九曜, Nine Luminaries — sun, moon, the five planets and the two lunar nodes, the governing bodies of the sky — are his juniors. The 元辰, the Primal Star-Powers, are lesser guests at his table. Every rank Tripiṭaka named as too senior to omit turns out to be too junior to bow to.
Pilgrim, hearing this, laughed till he tumbled over.
Pilgrim's reaction is physical: he laughs until he falls over. 笑得打跌 takes the light de — "laughed to the point of falling."
Bajie said, "Brother, what are you laughing at?"
怎的, zěn de, "at what."
Pilgrim said, "They say Old Sun can play the trickster — but it seems this Daoist lad can bind the wind!"
A connoisseur's appreciation. 搗鬼, dǎo guǐ, is to work a swindle, pull a fast one — Pilgrim's own speciality. 綑風, kǔn fēng, "to bind the wind," is his coinage on the spot and a better one: talk so empty there is nothing to tie the rope around. He is not disputing the claim, he is admiring the technique.
Tripiṭaka said, "Where is your revered master?"
令師, lìng shī, "your master" — the polite second-person form, using 令 as an honorific for another's relations.
The boys said, "Our master, on a summons sent down by the Primordial Heavenly Worthy, has gone to the Miluo Palace in the Heaven of Highest Clarity to hear the exposition of the 'Fruit of the Undifferentiated Way'; he is not at home."
The boys report the truth plainly: their master is out, at the Primordial Heavenly Worthy's lecture. 降簡 takes 降 as jiàng, "to send down," the character's descending sense rather than the xiáng of "subdue."
Pilgrim, hearing it, could not hold back and barked out: "This stinking Daoist brat — he doesn't even know who's who, yet plays the trickster to my face and rigs up his hollow scaffolding!
And Pilgrim, who a moment ago was laughing in admiration, now decides it is all a fraud. 臊道童 — 臊 is sāo, the rank-smelling sense, as in 腥臊, not the sào of 害臊, "bashful." 空心架子, kōng xīn jià zi, a hollow frame: scaffolding with no building inside it. 忍不住, could not hold it in; 喝 is hè, to bark or shout, not the hē of drinking.
Who at that Miluo Palace is any Great-Monad Heaven-Immortal?
太乙天仙, a Heaven-Immortal of the Great Monad — the rank the boys claimed for their lineage a few passages back. Pilgrim is saying nobody of that standing keeps company at the Miluo Palace.
And who invited this mangy calf's-hoof of yours to go expound anything?"
潑牛蹄子, pō niú tí zi — "mangy calf's-hoof," a piece of coarse vernacular abuse aimed at a child. Pilgrim has entirely lost the thread; he is now insulting a twelve-hundred-year-old adept for correctly describing his own master.
Tripiṭaka asks the obvious question about the scroll, and it is a well-informed one. He names the whole chain of command he expects to see honoured — the Three Pure Ones at the top, the Four Sovereigns beneath them, the officers of the Net-Heaven below that — and wants to know why an abbey of this standing has skipped all of it to burn incense at an abstraction.
The answer is the best joke in the chapter. The Three Pure Ones are their master's friends. The Four Sovereigns are old acquaintances. The Nine Luminaries — the sun, the moon, the five planets, the lunar nodes, the governing bodies of the visible sky — are his juniors. The Primal Star-Powers are lesser guests at his table. Every rank the monk named as too senior to omit turns out to be too junior to bow to, and even Heaven and Earth are a stretch: the boys note that Earth cannot properly receive their incense at all, and that the whole scroll is their master's 諂佞, sycophancy, hung up out of politeness to the cosmos.
Pilgrim laughs until he falls over, and pays the boys the compliment of a fellow professional: I thought I could work a swindle, but this lad can bind the wind. Then he decides it is all lies, and starts calling a twelve-hundred-year-old adept a stinking brat rigging up hollow scaffolding. The irony is thick and entirely at his expense — every word the boy said is true, and Pilgrim, who once bluffed his way through Heaven on exactly this kind of claim, is the one who cannot recognise the real thing when he hears it.